i'm back. but who knows for how long. anyways, at the moment i am coming to you live from the Noosa Shire public library where i am on holidays, stealing the free wifi and trying to re-connect with all you die hard fans of this blog.
i have no idea where to start. well, perhaps right now. as i mentioned, i am currently in noosa, my home town. my childhood memories. i flew in from melbourne at about midday of the 150th anniversary of the day where stupid white men dress in suits, get smashed, stare at fake tanned women and gamble and bet on the cruelty of racing the horse around a 3.2 km track. phew. glad i got that off my chest. horses, they are so amazing. and we just... hmmm that's another discussion.
the flight down was pretty pleasant, i had been warned about flying with tiger airways, a budget airline that has a pretty consistent history of beinf horrible. i arrived at the terminal thanks to jesse, and was alarmed at the amount of people crammed into this tiny bunker... about to board what i thought would be a tin can. not only did i get a window seat... i had the entire row to myself and it turned out that a former work colleague had decided she'd had enough of selling cameras at JBHIFI and was now a hostess! free muffin and water thank you! i wanted some assorted nuts, but, you can't always get nuts when you want them.
flash back about 72 hours earlier and i was in mad panic about finding a replacement housemate. it had been about 6 weeks since jesse had flown the nest and decided to live in the ultimate vegan/vegetarian household with a few other people, one of which was his GF. im not gonna lie, i was pretty upset, but kinda had the feeling that he would eventually move out... because he was so so smitten with his lady love. anyways... the time came when ben had to start looking for a housemate and god... if any of you know where i live, and the size of the apartment, you'd say it's cosy. it's not like, a box. but it is definitely and area that you'd want to be comfortable with the person you've chosen.
so, the advertisement when up on gum nut or gumtree and i was like, cool. i have a chance to show the world that i am a cool individual with lots to offer, and i'll find my ideal housemate. someone trendy and social, quiet and private, loved cinema and pop culture, someone that could cook and finally, someone with a skill that could come in handy. hairdresser, carpenter, fashion designer. the criteria wasn't outrageous, but perhaps my expectations were. i was like, sweet... got myself a cool ad, a bit quirky, but people like that right? WRONG.
140 people had looked at my ad. and 138 of them decided it was ... obviously not for them. ouch. mega ouch. by this stage, jesse had already paid for another months rent and time was getting tight for me to find my dream housemate. fast forward almost 4 weeks later and it was a sunday. at work. i now am at the bourke st store, which is actually a lot of fun. after my year stint at south wharf, and several key "personality" figures leaving the store, i thought it was about time to step up to the plate... and go to "like, the busiest store in the world" or so i had been told. so, sunday. it was the afternoon and i was doing my usual business. after what i thought had to be the cunt-iest day on record, in walks this tall man wearing a suit carrying a nice leather bag and umbrella.
at first, i checked out the umbrella. it was not to large, not to small. it wasnt like those fucking business men who think it's ok to bring a giant beach umbrella and walk the street thinking that they need 2 metres of coverage from the elements. it was just the right size. cool. he started heading to the BBC section. cooler. he started picking up DR WHO dvds.
BINGO
like a heat seeking mother fucking missile, i tried my shyest to approach this new man of my dreams. after hanging around like a bad smell, i had given up. he had his iPod in and you know that is basically "don't bother me.. i don't want to deal with your shit" i should know, i do it all the time. i started to sulk off, much like george michael in arrested development... but, in the corner of my eye... he came running up after me! ok, i started to freak. anyways, after a rather long conversation where i was rambling about how it's cheaper to buy DVDS online from amazon.co.uk and trying to explain who sooty was... it was time for him to leave. he made his purchase and walked out of my life for good.
"hey ben, you know that guy with the blonde hair..."
"yesssss..."
"well, he said you were really, really..."
(at the stage i thought... OMG OMG he loves me too...)
"helpful"
"ooh... well, um, yeh... helpful is good right?"
WOW. OK. not totally what i was after... but a good start. so, as i am leaving work... i switch on my grindr. possibly the creepiest app and the most useful app of all time. if you're not sure, give it a wiki. HE WAS ONLINE. wooooohoooo. after chatting to him for aaaages... i discovered not only is he a DR WHO fan... but he likes BATTLESTAR GALACTICA. he's a virgo. from NZ. has 4 mutual friends with jesse's girlfriend te ao marama... wow. it was all too good to be true. long story short, monday night, the night before i left to go away for 2 weeks. i said, sure. you can move in. i gave him my keys. and sent him on his way. i just hope that when i get back that my apartment is stripped bare and all he has left me was my LOST figurines. i can't see anyone else wanting them.
so, yes, flash forward 24 hours from that moment, i am enjoying my first "home cooked" meal with mother in the apartment she has had for about 10 years now. i think i have spoken about this before... but there's always such a sense of ... sadness about returning home. actually, i am not sure if sadness is the right word, but ... it just takes me back to all those years ago. we went to the local shopping centre, and there was the same cleaner that was there when i was 14 years old. the bakery still makes the same cake i used to BEG my parents to buy me. now, i can walk in and i don't have to ask mum or dad for the $3.90 ... small things like that. they fill me with ... i guess it's something i can't quite describe.
this is my second day back in Noosa, and i am already feeling restless. no trains. no trams. no sky-scrappers. no noise. just me. the sun. the pool. until, mum comes stomping up to me whilst i am trying to get a tan.
"ben, i need to clean your room. i have that guy coming around to have a look..."
"ok, well.. just put everything in a corner...."
she starts to walk off...
"oh, but, i wouldn't touch those socks. maybe use a glove or a bag or something"
... now, that's something that actually never happened 10 years ago. i guess there are some things that can happen for the first time in a place that is filled with experiences.
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