bored and blogging

ok... well, O.C has finished. i cried. a little. it was pretty emo when ryan went back to chino and him and marissa had to break up... meanwhile, all this was happening, kirsten - seth's mom - was totally crying her eyes out because ryan had left.. and as this was all happening, SETH himself was running away. all accompanied by "hallelujah" by jeff buckley...

IN OTHER NEWS...

sarah chuah has typhoid fever. as confirmed in recent email.

"last few days i havent been feeling very well, but today, our last day with the animals, i couldnt get out of bed, and after vomiting the entirity of my stomachs contents on the floor of our room, i started to feel serisouly sick. so anyway i went to a bolivian hospital tonight, and they drew blood, and diagnosed me with typhoid fever, sucks cause i feel sick as but it is treatable. i got lots of medication and the hospital was suprisingly fast and effecient. so anyway tomorrow i will also go back and they will test me for a parasite also, which apparently comes hand in hand with typhiod fever sometimes. "

you see, she has been working in a monkey zoo in bolivia during her travels. so, it all makes sense.

so, sarah chu has typhoid, sarah L has gone to NEW YORK for 3 and a 1/2 weeks... and the new sarah on the scene, although a rather old freind - SARAH K - will be arriving to live with me in the dead girl house!

** BIGGEST LOSER**

not that i watched it or anything, i have been inspired to start working out and eating more healthy - ie - no more hot chips and burgers and thickshakes... so, bring on the steamed brocolli, tuna and brown rice.

my plan is to go from this...


into something like this...


since we are on the jude law topic, apparently there have been recent articles and pix circulating about judes "trouser snake" im not going to show yall, but if you are into that kinda thing... google im sure will lead you there...

recent movies i have watched.

*takeway - aussie piece of rubbish (although, listen to the dvd menu theme song!!!)
*american splendour - "i am a nerd... blah blah... i suggest you try the pina-colada. they are suprisingly authentic" yeh, it was really good... ummm watch it!!!
*the magician - aussie comedy - you all know about it... funny, good, entertaining.
*cradle 2 the grave - jet li & dmx team up - so dum. like, totally. i thought maybe at least a cool fight scene. nah. just dum racial stereotypes and poor dialogue.

ohhh... and the last one which was really GOOD was "IN THIS WORLD" about people smuggling and the journey this 1 kid takes to get to england from peshawar. it was really moving and it totally was real. if you dont like animal slaughter (a cow's head is like, hacked off) or confined spaces, look away, but definately watch this film. it was made by the guy who made 9 songs - that movie where they just have sex for 89-ish minutes or something. but, yeh, check it out. moving stuff..

"the journey to freedom has no borders"

sick as a god

im a little sick lately, it seems like i have had a sore throat for about 2 weeks now... ( i have lost count of days lately thanks to my O.C mush-brain thing...) but, anyways, i was thinking, whats the throat equivalent of "draino" ?? well, a trip to my local pharmacy provided all the answers... thanks to this cheap and nasty product called "senagar" which cost only $4.05 ... (in my budget)

... i thought, what would happen if i poured a large amount of toxic cleaner down my throat?? well, this...


then this...
followed by this...

the whole experience reminded me of being a child and the all the chuah's medical box consisted of was band-aids, aspro clear, chinese "itchy" oil and this fucking crap that tastes like licorice extract with vinegar and some pineapple juice along for the ride. anyways, lets all hope im better soon or these blogs might lose whatever sense of credit or humor they have...

p.s- only 3 more episodes of O.C season 1 to go... HOW'S IT GOING TO END???

OCD (orange county disorder)

first of all... just like to paste a current dum convo im having with my mom over msn...

bne says:
read my blog still?

vicki says:
every day

bne says:
its good huh? you love it?

vicki says:
yep, especially the gay comments

bne says:
you're dum

vicki says:
thanks

anyways, on to business... as you all know i've been brainwashed by the local hotties that reside in the O.C. this has lead to many nights of restless dreams, many featuring said talent. dreams include....

- shopping with seth, anna & summer - having to listen to witty banter that drives me insane.
- washing marissa's hair and trying to stlye it coz i am her brother
- trying to get ryan out of jail (again) coz i am his brother...

man! it doesnt stop. and either can i. i just got the 5th disc from work. GOD HELP ME! i am only 19... (in keeping with anzac celebrations...)

BIG BROTHER... wow... what a total bunch of losers.

they have already lost $95,000 in the first 48 hours for dis-obeying BB's rules!!!

crazy. 50,000 for not having mic's on. duuuuum!

oc. big brother. more oc.

oh, and some yum cha.

lately i have been buying box sets for work, some of which included the 1st & 2nd seasons of THE O.C... and yes, i realise im about 3 years late with it all but i am TOTALLY HOOKED! fuck, its so good it deserves the eff word. anyways, currently (for those who watched) i am up to about episode 16 or something like that with crazy oliver, marissa's therapy friend who i am convinced is going to cut someone soon. he is a nutter. so, i've managed to watch about 16 ep's in say, mmm about 30 hours or something like that. CALIFORNIAAAAAA... !!!!


p.s- can you say "see ya later" to a vision impaired person?

the reason i ask is i had a conversation with an old lady at the train station and it was EXCELLENT for me as i hate making eye contact with people when i talk. anyways, she was nice and said "god bless" to me, followed by "happy days..."

WHAT'S THE BIG BROTHER SECRET...

im sooooooooooo dying for it to start and so i can finally find out what it is. my theory is it is going to be an all gay & lesbian household. everyone thinks im an idiot. but, imagine. controversy. i dunno... it would be cool and quite popular as straight males cant resist hot lesbians, gay gays love gay guys, straight girls, mmm i dont know... and lesbians love gays and lesbians... well, at least that is my opinion on things have watched several episodes of queer as folk. oh well. im probably totally wrong. but, least i will be eating a jaffle and maybe my words in a matter of minutes.

ikea visit

a toast to my beautiful wife leila, may her goodwill and spirit live forever in our happy home!

what trip to ikea is a trip to ikea with-out a celebratory trip to ikea hotdog???


p.s- i had 2 in the time it took leila and mozz to eat only 1. does that make me a fatty?



still going. no. 2.

training day. two interesting mo's on the train.

1- basically this normal looking guy is on the phone going through the city loop... he sounds like a monotone matt

man - (talking into phone) yeh, yeh... hello? yeh, ok. i'll get off at essendon and walk to the tram. hey? you there? (the phone is cutting out) okay. see you soon. ok. yeh, its cutting out.

now, at this time, he has pulled the phone away from his ear and still continues to talk.
man - (talking to himself) yeh, it's cut out. i cant here you. no. nah, cant hear you.

meanwhile, there is a 16 y.o girl leaning herself so far out into the aisle of the train looking so bewildered. i'll try and find a picture to represent her expression.


yeh. she looked something like that. but older. it was funny.

who wouldnt?

check out a blog called post secret where basically peeps spill the beans on themselves... the pic above is definately a fave!!!

http://postsecret.blogspot.com/

blog style

as per normal lately i have been watching a few movies here and there... now before you think this may be going somewhere it isnt.

i watched the notebook - man, was that a let down... so much for being the ultimate chick flick cry your eyes out love story... it was average... all they did was kiss lots and get torn apart... i was expecting like, beaches meets pearl harbour without the war or something... anyways, it was good... i guess it was just a PURE love story... no cliche's just tonnes of love and emo... but not enough heightened drama for this baz wannabe...

bourne supremacy.... kicked arse... team america says "matt day-mon" but i says "matt d-amen" yeh, nah, it was cool, pretty like, actiony and hand held style, just the way i like it really gritty and dirty and the car chase at the end was all intense and bang and clang... good suppporting cast including the always scary (here comes my name dropping abilities) brian cox and the lovely joan allen... (who is currently in negotiations to be in my movie in a few yrs time) some pretty cool bonus features on the dvd... the director is about to release one of the 1st 911 stories, its called united 93, so check it out...

oh, and i watched just like heaven with reese and mark and a whole lotta love... it was emo and cute and sad and funny... thank god they got together in the end... i was a little worried for a sec! but, nah, it was good... reese is just reese, you love her in anything really... coz....... "i got arms... and i got arms, let's get together and use those arms..." walk the line style! it was good, i got a little teary at some of the gay emo scenes... and, yeh, just a happy emo mushie love flick really!!! sweet as apple pie!

so, back to reality... crazy times!

set the scene. melb central food court. lunch. tonnes'o'people.

suddenly, this loud THUD! i turn around, like, 5 feet away from me and this business suit dude just collapsed. kind of comical at the same time because fried rice and (from what i could tell) was lemon or honey chicken went everywhere. he was just lying there. everyone just stared for like 5 seconds. suddenly everyone went rushing over to him. i just sat there. i suck at trauma situations. i just freeze like likim and make the same "ahhhrremmm" noise looking worried. "ROLL HIM ON HIS SIDE!!!" panic. everyones pulling out there phones to call an ambulance. anyways, the dude wakes up and sits up and someone gives him some pepsi to calm him down. he looked pale and tired. i dunno what was wrong with him. and it was thanks to him that i couldnt finish my felafel kebab. (HE'S FINE. DON'T WORRY.)

so, today i go back to my old house where i have a tonne of mail waiting for me. my concession card arrived so i can rip off the aust. govt. and get cheap transport. i was happy. then i had 2 notices saying that i had registered post to be picked up. i was soooo excited. thinking it was a DVD comp. or perhaps it was that $90 worth of easter egg's that i had entered a while back. anyways, off i trot to the local p.o all excited thinking i had chocolates or a DVD... NOPE! asking the lass @ the desk, what it was... she said, "ohh, looks like it's something from the commonwealth games... were you a volunteer?" oh man, i thought all that shit was behind me. thinking it was vouchers for perhaps, a free CD or a 2 for 1 movie ticket... OR maybe just a simple free boost juice... NOPE! it was a stupid medal and certificate. for me? the laziest effing volunteer who didnt show up for 4 shifts and got to go the closing ceremony to see john farnham. couldn't they give me some vouchers or shit? anyways.... im not ungrateful or anything. practical. vouchers would've been much more practical in life.

cold ankles & fat stomach

meh. sunday. easter. chocolat. work.

well, the last few days of life have been rather boring consisting of work and work and sleeping and watching movies, ie. fat albert, king kong (4th time) etc etc... although, lately i have had a few adventures that should be providing some source material for future blogs...

1. photo shoot!!


last week i participated in what was described @ the time as something ala picture above. it comprised of me playing random "phat beatz" on my iPod like, "yeah!" by usher, and "dont cha" - pussycat dolls which is still actually one of my top songs!! so, there should be some pics of that coming up shortly, as well as the much anticipated pictures of my house with furniture as i will no longer be living with a dead girl anymore!!! YAY


2. scary movie 4

MUCH MUCH better than 3... i never thought i'd say that in my life, but, some key laughs were the neck breaking scene thanks to my company who was laughing his black ass off and pointing at the screen, and also when they spoke in japanese by saying such racist things as... " sushi samurai teryaki mitsubishi hitachi" which translated to "where is your father?" mmm fun times i acutally laughed so much i cried... and looked something like a mix of these two pictures...

&

i would say go watch it for some cheap laughs where people are always getting knocked out with "boing" sound effects... they do the lot in this flick, saw, brokeback mountain, war of the worlds, village, grudge & million $$$ baby to name a few...

until next time,

happy easter

well, happy easter to the 3 people that read this... hope ya'll having an eggcellent day... i couldnt resist that one...

movies i have watched lately include...

sex - the annabel chong story
fat albert... HEY HEY HEY
KING KONG PRODUCTION DIARIES
wadd... doco about a pornstar had a big DING-A-LING
cabin fever ... cheap-o horro flick with some dodge acting...

IN OTHER NEWS...

lately i have been trying to adjust to life on macaulay rd. vs. racecourse rd.

there are a few good shops around but nothing compared to my 'old pals' around the corner...

things i miss

asian lass charcoal chicken
somali lass charcoal chicken
kebabs & big chopstix

things i have GAINED!!!

the other day i went into my local foodstore to stock up on "survival supplies" ie. soap and at the check out i had this waiting for me...

yes, that's right... A GAY! not just a nice gay, but this overly sarcastic (seemed to be) nice, excessively friendly gay... the bad gays...

now before you come around to my empty house with coconuts and bowling balls to bash my head in about being a homo hater take a few steps back buddies... i love gays... they are great. without them, we wouldnt have queer-eye, joh bailey hair products and other such things... but, back to my scenario

me buying soap. read him with overly gay tone.

BEN (walking to register) - hi, just this please
GAY CHECKOUT LAD - do you want a bag for that?

then i thought, hang on... its an effing 5 pack of dove you dipstick... why the eff do i want a bag for that??

GAY LAD - okay, well, you have yourself a fantastic evening...
BEN LAD - yeh, you yoo...

WHAT THE EFF?? SERIOUSLY... WHAT WAS I GOING TO DO WITH 5 EFFING BARS OF DOVE SOAP THAT WOULD MAKE IT A FANTASTIC EVENING???

i bet this is what HE was thinking...

novelty soap courtesy of google images

he was gay and annoying... and not even hot gay like this man

dude from evita & best pals wedding

joys of an empty house

basically as you all know im home alone in an empty house. contents include...

1. lord of the rings tumbler
2. computer
3. bed
4. tv
5. remote

as for any sign of utensils and plates, there are none. so here are the steps taken to eat pastie & sausage rolls.

- place 1 pastie and 2 x sausage rolls in oven.
- use SIX socks all at one time for oven glove.
- use 1 biro to insert and check pastie temp.
- use 1 MX newspaper as plate.

now... im not bush tucker man, but when it comes to improvising... i take the cake!

movies i have watched lately are....

gattaca, notebook, hedwig & the angry inch... cant think of the rest...

DVD OF THE MOMENT

KING KONG!!!

24 IS AWESOME!!!



and oh, there was carrying approx. 8 kilo's of washing over 1 km to an effing laundromatte to prove my independence and stupidity of spending approx. 10 clams on drying my smalls. meh.

anyways, i got a job (not paid) on a tv show for channel 31 called ballystix (they cant spell either apparently) doing camera in studio. meet the crew soon. hopefully some nutters.

another week in ben

ewwww...

umm yeh, so anyways, once again, hello to the 3 people approx. that this actually reaches... here is another (delayed) update for my blog... it's just gonna be a mish mash of things really...

1- the triangle...

ARGHHHH!!! what a load of horse S. seriously.... "how much do you know about the bermuda triangle" boomed sammy in those effing promo's... and after wasting 4 hrs of my life i still no S. man.... that got my goat for the week...

2- movies slash dvds...

lately, do to my extreeeemely poor-ness lately i have been "hiring" dvds from work... i will try and review all the movies i have watched recently in a poor fashion...

- grizzly man

basically about this nut who "protects" grizzly bears and then gets eaten by the very thing he lurved... emo, messed up, nutty and a little chilling... he is quite a character - watch this if you dont want to go into the woods.... my only problem is that i didnt hear the audio of his getting ripped apart.... man i sick! "****" - final countdown

-dumb & dumberer

yeh, i know... im dum... but i had to see what the dealio was... anyways, it wasnt bad... i laughed when they said the S word like 20 times coz sum guy thort he had S'd eferywhare.... i thank i mughta snortthed... i carnt remember... ummmm yeh, so, lame but fun and there was a lesbian pash so something for everyone really.... oh, and i couldnt believe that the guy that played llyod- which was jim carrey's character was actually a "hottie" in real life... so, never judge a nerd by they face!!! lesson there for all of us... "**1/2" - final countdown

-crash (david cronenburger)

man... i never seen any of his stuff before, i remember seeing the fly when i was younger but that was just coz of jeff "jurassic park" goldblum was in it... basically people that have car crashes or have severely effed up body's having sex everywhere... mainly in cars and stupid places where the camera is all up against it... meh... i fell asleep in this one.... twice! james spader is creepy and holly "piano" hunter is weird... i liked it better when she didnt talk against the wild and wonderful new zealand landscapes... "***" - final countdown

-saved

yeh, another teeny movie with god-like proportions... meh... um it was about mandy moore's character was a geez-us nutter who wanted everything to be perfect.. it was cool... had some funny scenes and even mr. culkin pulled off being a crippled... (no effence) yeh... i dunno with this one.. it was good and that was it really... just kinda nice... watch it... you wont be disaappointed "***1/2" - final countdown

-alien

oh mannn.... i have never effing seen an alien movie before... none of them... anyways, so, i thought i would watch from the beginning and see what the guy that brought us gladiator had in his early days... (man, someones cooking eggs and im hungry) yeh, so, it was coool... not much alien, but thats what you get when you wanna have low budgie or summink im guessing... but, sigourney was fun, she kicked ass and the little bilbo from rings was good.... spoiler for those who havent seen it look away now... HE WAS AN EFFING ROBOT!!! didnt pick that one up... there was some good tension and aliens freaked my out with its slime and icky factor... final confrontation was a let down though.. but i guess thats why they got like, 4 more sequels... bring them on... "***1/2" - final countdown

-zero day

okay, so im settling in for the night after new neighbours tapped on the wall coz my speakers were to high when i was skipping through "walk the line" preview disc... (i know, already!!!) anyways, so i decided to watch this movie that i thought was a doco about these boys who shot up their school in USA... pieced together, the dir. uses all their home video footage and it goes along as they plot and plan mission "zero day" ummmmmmmmmm.... so, yeh, as it turns out it was all fake, only did i realise this when it said NOT REAL on the back cover... dog im dumd! yeh, so, really good... script was all really real but i did feel a little motional sickness when eating my pastie... watch it, its good... i would recco it to ppl to liked elephanto.... same thingy i guess... "****" - final countdown

-remember the titans

oh please... just what i need... another racial-feel-good-they-all-are-buds-in-the-end-when -they- have-to-work-as-a-team movie!!! EFF YEAH!!! good old blackie denzel in another heartie role being all emo and inspirational about football.... makes me wish i was fit really... so, bruckheimer was attached to this, its got all the trademarks of him all over it even the score which was done with long time pal trevor something who also did armageddon... which it seemed like he ripped the music for this film... SCANDAL.... anyways, it was emo and we all effing knew they were gonna win and someone was gonna die... but, i had to watch it as a man came into work who worked at k-mart tyre and auto service and commended my on my excellent customer service and shook my hand saying... "you have no idea how much it means to a customer" so, that was emo and then he asked if we had it saying it was the ULTIMATE inspirational movie... man, you dont muck with a guy that changes oil and tyres when he says ULTIMATE.... anyways................... back to my effing review... yeh, it was good... i probably had a little tear when something happened to a black person or summink... yeh, but noo, but yeh!!!
"***" - final countdown



yeh, that will do for the movies section.... more reviews to come i guess... i have watched many more but forgotten what they were!!!

yeh, on another note... this is gonna be FIN for now, my fingers and toes are freeezing
bye!!

sunday night viewing

omg... it seems like i have waited six effing hours to watch part one of channel nines new drama that will be screened over to compelling nights... im talking about sam "jurassic park 3" neill's BERMUDA TRIANGLE.... (see pic below)



meanwhile, i have endured the most shittiest programme line-up to get to this C grade crap...

firstly, "clever" hosted by logie award winning georgie parker... dont get me wrong, i effing loved all saints... and still secretly do... but this show sucked...

then i watched a mix of "australias "brainiest" footballer.... (wtf?) and 60 effing minutes with "spoilt brat" leisel jones about her depression....

WE ALL HAVE EFFFING DEPRESSION THESE DAYS!!!!


ARGGHHHHHH!!!

plus, i feel that likims house is in some sort of "kensington triangle" because no matter what time it is in real life, it feels like it is at least 7 1/2 hours later....

ok, i am going now to watch this television thing... it better be worth my effing time.... it has the chick from J.A.G so, who knows???